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Yes, people, I'm back -- for the third time -- with an excerpt from a published book. Care to share? You know how it's done; someone adds to the original excerpt, and subsequent (hopefully there will be some!) contributors add to the person before them. Have fun. Here goes...
The thought of Mom being upset and guilt-ridden was an interesting reversal. I have to admit, it was strangely liberating.
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The thought of Mom being upset and guilt-ridden was an interesting reversal. I have to admit, it was strangely liberating.
It quickly brought to the fore two critical questions. How long would it last, and how could I take advantage of her weakness.
I sat at my lap top with the missing letter Q to think and write, as the two have evolved into one for me. Surrounded by a bagel with lox (no cream cheese thank you - lactose intolerance) and a Cranberry Raspberry diet Snapple (no cafeine due to its strong effect on me)I started to talmudically analyze the situation.
Here's what I sang to myself in the old tune of yeshiva student asking questions on a piece of Gemorah: On the one hand - it's not new for my mother to be upset at me ("you do too much?," "what are you so busy with?," "why were you late?") On the other hand - it IS new for my mother to feel guilt ridden in regard to me.
No, say better: she may feel guilty in regard to me all the time, I can't know for sure. But what IS clearly new is her expressing that she's guilt ridden ("I shouldn't have said what I said," "Please forgive me," "Did you really forgive me or only say the words?"
Included in her guilt is her eternal art of making me feel guilty. You could argue that she's not guilt ridden but merely manipulating me to feel guilty. Yet, I see it as her expressing guilt herself; something new.
Assuming I was right, that she was feeling guilty, it was time to plan.
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